I'd like to do an impression of Dr. Phil, the pop psychologist and everyone's therapist. (I don't claim to have his voice or mannerisms down; I'm just attempting his style.) Imagine that someone says to him, “Dr. Phil, I don't feel like my life counts for much. I don't think I’m very important to anybody, or at least not to very many people. What should I do?”

I suspect that Dr. Phil would answer something to the effect, “Hey, look! If you want to be important to people, you gotta do something important for people! You only get out of life what you put into it!”

OK, that’s the end of my Dr. Phil impression. Actually, the words that I put into Dr. Phil's mouth are the essence of today’s message. We're continuing our six-part series about “Living a Relevant Life.” Two weeks ago we discussed the fact that our lives count for something — that they’re relevant — because we're important to God! Last week we went on to say that once you know you're important to God, it's good to know that He has a purpose for your being in this world. He has us in the time and place He wants us, and He can use our uniqueness right where He has us.

Today we want to be specific about what exactly our purpose, or call from God, consists of. What’s our purpose for being here?

Let me use an illustration. Imagine that you have a wealthy young friend who invites you to stay at his luxurious house with a pool, game room, big-screen TV, and all kinds of other things that can pleasantly occupy your time. Your friend asks you to do a few small chores around the house, and then he mentions one more thing: you're supposed to watch his child. Your friend leaves, and there you are with all those things in this wonderful house — and with his small child. What's going to be the main thing you do? Work on the odd jobs? Watch the big-screen TV? Swim in the pool? No; you’re going to be taking care of the child!

God has placed each of us on this earth in a certain time and place. There's a lot we can do, a lot to entertain us, a lot we could try to accomplish, a lot to deal with (it is, after all, a very imperfect world). What should be our main task? Let Jesus tell us in His own words: “This is my command: Love each other.” (John 15:17)

God has no needs of His own. He really needs nothing from us, because He has everything. What He does want from us, however, is help with taking care of His other children. Let's flesh out what Jesus was saying in His command for us to love each other.

JESUS' TEACHING ON BEING RELEVANT THROUGH RELATIONSHIPS
In the 15th chapter of the gospel of John we have a record of Jesus' teaching how to have a productive, relevant, fruitful life. He used the imagery of a grape vine, with its clusters of plump, juicy grapes. In Jesus' day there would be few images as good at portraying productivity as that one.

Jesus said, “I am the vine; you are the branches. If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.” (John 15:5) We have the choice of having a relationship with God and His Son Jesus. God wants such a relationship, but He won't force it on us. We're important to Him, and He wants us to have Him as the most important part of our lives. Jesus was saying that without this connection with Him and the Father, we can do nothing really important with our lives and we aren't relevant from God’s point of view (which is the ultimate point of view).

This connection isn’t just for convenience or mutual benefit. It's meant to be a personal connection based on love. Jesus continued, “As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Now remain in my love.” (John 15:9) This is amazing! Jesus was telling His disciples that He loved them (and this is for us, too!) just as the God the Heavenly Father loved Him! The kind of love that has eternally existed within the triune nature of God between Father and Son (and Holy Spirit, too) is the same kind of love relationship, in some mysterious way, that Jesus wants to have with us!

How can we experience this ultimate relationship with Jesus? “If you obey my commands, you will remain in my love, . . .” (John 15:10) What does He mean by His commands? “My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you.” (John 15:12) A few statements later He repeated it for emphasis: “This is my command: Love each other.” (John 15:17) The apostle John, who heard those words stated by Jesus in person, commented on them years later in one of his letters (now part of our New Testament): “Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another.” (1 John 4:11-12)

If our lives are to be relevant — to count for anything at all — we have to invest in the lives of the people God has put around us. The greatest investment we can make is in people's lives.

A fruitful, successful, relevant life has little to do with how much money we have, how great a job we have, how many things we own, how much influence we have, or how much fame we have. From God's perspective (which is the one that really counts) we’re relevant — our lives count for something —– when we make a difference in the lives of the people He has placed around us.

IT'S A COMMON-SENSE CONCEPT
It shouldn't surprise us that obeying God's command to invest in the lives of others is the best way to live. God's way is always the best way; it’s ultimately the common-sense way. On the surface it seems to make more sense to watch out for yourself and your own interests first, but in the long run that really doesn't work. That's living selfishly, and it leads to a lonely life.

We've all heard it said that you get out of life what you put into it. The amount that we invest in the lives of others is a prime example of this. I've noticed that the people who get the most cards when they’re hospitalized are the ones who send the most cards to other people. People only see us as important to the degree that we see them as important. Over the years we've had a few people get upset and not come back to church because they were gone for a couple of months and no one bothered to let them know that they were missed. Certainly we should all make an effort to reach out to those sheep of the flock who drift away, and we do that — including through our Shepherd's Group ministry. However, the truth is that if someone can stay away for a couple of months and not be missed, they must not have been investing themselves much in the lives of others so that they would be missed!

The bottom line is that we each control the extent that we’re missed when we aren't around for a while. We shouldn’t reach out to people just because we want to be wanted, but it certainly is a pleasant byproduct!

It’s tempting to pull back from people when they annoy us, hurt us, or let us down. The problem is that if we keep pulling back and pulling away, eventually the only person we’re around is ourselves — and we won't even like that person very much! I believe that it was Billy Graham who said that the world's smallest package is a person all wrapped up in himself.

How do we invest ourselves in the lives of others? There are seven specific Scriptures that identify ways we can do that. That investment will result in our own lives’ being enriched and relevant.

ENCOURAGING
We live in a difficult world; everyone gets beaten down. What all of us want, almost more than anything else, is a little encouragement! We want to be told “You're doing a good job” or “You'll make it; I just know you will” or some other words or an act of kindness that will lift our spirits. “Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.” (1 Thessalonians 5:11) Decide to encourage someone today! When you encourage someone, you put courage in them to keep on!

ACCEPTING
All of us want to be accepted for who we are. It's not that we shouldn't change for the better; we all should, because it's what growing in Christ is all about. However, we all need to feel that we’re accepted as we are; that's called unconditional love. Every single person has habits that annoy us, imperfections that can make it tough to deal with them, and sin that often ends up hurting us. People need to know that we care for them before they get their acts together! “Accept one another, then, just as Christ accepted you, in order to bring praise to God.” (Romans 15:7)

BURDEN-BEARING
Everyone carries burdens. We all need people to help us bear our burdens by listening, being willing to pray for us, and even helping with a task. An old Swedish proverb states, “Shared joy is a double joy; shared sorrow is half.” Ironically, when we focus on helping someone else bear his burdens we tend to forget about our own burdens for a while. “Carry each others' burdens, and in this way you fulfill the law of Christ.” (Galatians 6:2)

HONORING
It's good that everyone has a birthday once a year, but we all need to feel honored by others more than once a year! Giving someone a compliment, affirming him in some way, or praising him makes anyone feel ten feet tall. Often our insecurities drive us to brag about ourselves, thinking others will like us better, when in reality they'll like us better if we brag about them! “Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves.” (Romans 12:10)

WELCOMING
Do people feel as if we enjoy having them around, or do they get the sense that they're intruding and are an annoyance or an interruption? People are rejected enough; they love a person who’s welcoming. That’s also called hospitality, and it includes inviting people into our homes. Too often we think we have to have everything just perfect and a big meal prepared before we can have someone stop by. The best host or hostess is a person who’s relaxed, sits down, and has a nice conversation. “Offer hospitality to one another without grumbling.” (1 Peter 4:9)

FORGIVING
We can't have long-term successful relationships unless we practice forgiveness. Forgiveness simply means that we won't hold on to what a person did wrong; we let it go. Forgiveness means that we consider our relationship with a person more important than a sin committed against us by that person. When things get messed up on a computer to the point where nothing works well, you simply reboot and start over. Forgiveness is rebooting a relationship after it has been messed up. “Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.” (Colossians 3:13)

SERVING
The word serving covers all the other ways, wraps them all up, and concludes the matter. Companies succeed or fail based on how well they serve their customers, and relationships succeed or fail based on how well we serve each other. “Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others.” (Philippians 2:4)

Think about that make-believe scenario at the beginning of this message. You could enjoy your friend's pool and the large-screen TV and you could work on some of the projects your friend left for you to do. You'd probably do all of that, but your main focus would be on your friend's child — because what mattered most was the child entrusted to your care.

Our Heavenly Father has placed us in this world at a certain time and place. There are things to do, problems of our own to solve, and things to enjoy — and that's all well and good. However, He has placed people around us — within our spheres of influence — whom He deeply cares about. We’re supposed to live people-centered lives. Down deep we'll know we're doing things right, and we'll find ourselves living relevant lives!

“You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you to go and bear fruit – fruit that will last. Then the Father will give you whatever you ask in my name. This is my command: Love each other.” (John 15:16-17)