Life's a challenge; we often feel as if we're being beaten up by it. Everyone can use some encouragement! There’s a well-known photo of a cat clinging to the end of a rope; the picture has the caption, “Hang in there!” We often feel like we're at the end of our ropes, and we need to hear those words and be encouraged.

Let me make a disclaimer: I don't always encourage other people as I should. I wish I could say that I always practice what I preach, but I'm not in heaven yet so I'm a work in progress. The beauty of a preacher’s being a pastor and living among the people he preaches to on Sunday is that they know him as he really is — so I'll tell you right now that I need this message about being an encourager as much as anyone. That being said, let's explore the idea of being encouragers.

THE POWER OF ENCOURAGEMENT
There's tremendous power in encouragement. When someone pays you a compliment, tells you that you can do something, or in some other way says something nice to you, it makes you feel like a million bucks! You feel like you've just gotten a shot of energy, and it strengthens your resolve to keep going.

Rebar is used in concrete work. Rebar is a structure of steel rods that concrete is poured over or around to strengthen the concrete. What rebar is to concrete, encouragement is to people: it strengthens us.

I remember going through Lamaze classes with Diann before Julie was born. When Diann went into labor I had a chance to apply what I had learned. Part of my job as the “coach” for Diann was to encourage her in different ways: I was to help her focus on some object in the room, rub her back, help her breathe properly, hold her hand, and try not to say anything stupid. Years before, husbands were left in the waiting room; now we’re a part of the delivery process, and a big part of what we do is being there to encourage our wives.

Our son Dan is a police detective. Every year the police officers have to go through a physical agility test, and part of the test is a 1½-mile run. Another officer was greatly concerned that he wouldn't be able to run that far, so Dan offered to run with him. Dan said he stayed with the man, though he himself could have finished the run in a much shorter time. The man had to stop and walk part of the way; then Dan told him that they had to start running again. Dan kept telling his friend that he could do it, and he did! In fact, Dan helped him finish the run in less than the maximum time allowed. By running beside the man, Dan encouraged him — and it's very likely that he wouldn't have finished the run without Dan. There's tremendous power in encouragement!

It's no wonder, then, that the apostle Paul wrote to the Thessalonian Christians, “Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.” (1 Thessalonians 5:11) That's why we get together regularly as a church: to encourage each other. The writer of Hebrews told his readers (and us, too), “And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds. Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another – and all the more as you see the Day [the second coming of Christ] approaching.” (Hebrews 10:24-25) Living for Jesus isn’t easy. We need to encourage each other, but we can’t do that unless we get together, as this Hebrews passage reminds us. We can spur one another on, and we need to do that because there's tremendous power in encouragement!

Scholar, author, and pastor William Arthur Ward wrote, “Flatter me, and I may not believe you. Criticize me, and I may not like you. Ignore me, and I may not forgive you. Encourage me, and I will not forget you. . . .”

Encouragement has tremendous power. However, being an encourager has a cost: you can't think of yourself first!

“AFTER YOU!”
Sometimes when we’re approaching a door or getting into a checkout line we’ll be nice and say, “After you.” “After you” is a key element in being an encourager; to be real encouragers we have to put others first.

There’s often a temptation in a social setting to try to impress people with who we are. That rarely works; usually their impression of us is that we're trying to impress them! The apostle Paul wrote, “Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves.” (Romans 12:10) Honoring another person above ourselves is a key to encouraging someone. We should relate to people in such a way that they’re more impressed with themselves than they are with us.

Here's the bottom line for being encouraging: you can't think of your own needs or interests first! Our first reaction to this is to wonder who's going to meet our needs; who's going to encourage us? Given the fact that we can't force someone to encourage us, and because people tend to give back what they get, it makes sense to look out for the other person's needs and encourage them.

There's a danger here, though: encouraging others can be manipulative. Gene Getz, a pastor and author, wrote that some people live with a revised Golden Rule. Instead of “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you,” it's “Do unto others so they will do for you.”

We have to be willing to honor others above ourselves without the expectation of getting something back. We shouldn't do a favor expecting the other person to return it; that's attempting to establish a business relationship instead of a relationship based on love. We have to hand out encouragement with no expectation of its being returned. It often is returned, because people like other people who are encouraging, but that shouldn't be our motive.

WATCH OUT FOR JUDGING AND NEGATIVISM
One of the best ways to be an encourager is simply to refrain from doing the opposite: judging others and being negative with them. Most of us are needy people; we feel inadequate or unimportant. If we feel that we come up short in our own eyes or in the eyes of other people and there's no easy way to have ourselves built up, we're tempted to tear them down. For some strange reason, we feel better about ourselves if we can judge others and put them down, either to their faces or behind their backs. Jesus said, “Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven.” (Luke 6:37) That doesn't mean that there aren't times and places when we have the responsibility to assess someone's performance or to judge what they're doing. Parents, bosses, teachers — all of us, in certain situations — are called to judge and assess others. However, most of the time we haven't been given that responsibility by anyone, and we shouldn't be doing it!

Sometimes we take perverse pleasure in the faults and failings of others. It makes us feel good that we aren’t like those people. We may even communicate that attitude, directly or indirectly. A Swedish proverb states, “Love me when I least deserve it, because that's when I really need it.”

The apostle Paul wrote, “We who are strong ought to bear with the failings of the weak and not to please ourselves. Each of us should please his neighbor for his good, to build him up. For even Christ did not please himself . . . . Accept one another, then, just as Christ accepted you, . . .” (Romans 15:1-3,7) We need to break the habit of seeing first what's wrong with a person or situation — and instead establish the habit of first seeing something good about that person or situation.

William Arthur Ward wrote, “A true friend knows your weakness but shows you your strengths; feels your fears but fortifies your faith; sees your anxieties but frees your spirit; recognizes your disabilities but emphasizes your possibilities.” That's encouragement!

YOUR ULTIMATE SOURCE OF ENCOURAGEMENT
Being an encourager isn’t easy; sometimes it seems almost impossible. How can we encourage someone else when we're discouraged? How can we praise someone else, when there's some reason to, if that person never praises us? How can we be helpful to someone who’s no help at all to us? The apostle Paul warned us, “Do not repay anyone evil for evil.” (Romans 12:19) It's often difficult to follow that command.

Jesus showed how we can do it. In the upper room, on the night He was going to be arrested (and the next day executed on the cross), He did a servant's task of washing His disciples' feet. They should have been washing His feet; what gave Jesus the power to do for others what they rightly should have done for Him? The key is found in one verse in the apostle John’s account of this event. Just before he described Jesus’ picking up the bowl and towel, John wrote, “Jesus knew that the Father had put all things under his power, and that he had come from God and was returning to God; so he got up from the meal, took off his outer clothing, and wrapped a towel around his waist. After that, he poured water into a basin and began to wash his disciples' feet, drying them with the towel that was wrapped around him.” (John 13:3-5)

Jesus knew that the Heavenly Father had given Him power, and that He was God's beloved. Jesus' absolute dependence on the Heavenly Father, and His identity of being in the Father, gave Him the ability to serve those who should have been serving Him!

This is the key to our serving others, encouraging them even when the people or circumstances don’t make us want to do it. We can look beyond our own need to be helped or encouraged, beyond what someone may have said or done to us, beyond anything that inhibits us from being encouraging, because we know that God empowers us and that we’re His beloved children! The apostle Paul wrote that it’s “God who gives endurance and encouragement . . . .” (Romans 15:5) We can give courage to others when we’re open to God’s putting His courage into us!

PRACTICAL STEPS
Our assignment from the Lord this week is to be encouragers, looking for opportunities to encourage other people wherever He places us. You won't have to look far; the people you're nearest to would be a good start. There are also other people you may not see often but whom God will bring across your path.

Being an encourager might involve saying something simple, such as “That was a good meal,” “Thanks, “You're doing a great job,” or “I couldn't have done that as well as you did.” It might mean just listening to someone pour out his heart. It might mean taking a meal to someone, or giving a ride to someone who doesn't drive or have a car.

The apostle Paul wrote, “Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn.” (Romans 12:14) Being an encourager often means coming beside someone who’s running out of steam, like our son Dan's friend in that physical agility test. We encourage someone when we stand with them emotionally.

The opportunities to be an encourager are endless! Let’s make part of Saint Francis of Assisi's prayer our own: “O Divine Master, grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled as to console; to be understood as to understand; to be loved as to love; . . .”